Getting personal without getting close.(And a shameless self plug!)

In many relationships, especially romantic ones, interpersonal communication plays a key role in maintaining a healthy and sustainable relationship.The traditional view of interpersonal communication is one that involves a face-to-face interaction of sorts.

But have you ever found yourself in a situation when a "normal" face-to-face interaction is simply not enough or rather, not exactly the ideal method of getting your message across to the other party?

Take for example the shy and meek boy who secretly has been admiring that cute girl who has been sitting in the 3rd row in class for some time. He wants to get his feelings across to her, at least tell her that he's interested and wants to get to know her better.
Or the forlorn lover who has to contend with his angry partner after a heated argument. He wants to apologize but she doesn't even want to see his face at the moment.

What can they do?

This is where non face-to-face but nonetheless still personal aspect of communication comes into the fray. Say hello to written letters, poems, emails, mobile text and voice messages guys!

Many may argue that since there is a lack of direct feedback and the physical detachment of letters and the such, messages lose their "personal" touch and may not be as effective as when it is being conveyed in person.

I would like to think otherwise. I'm not saying that face-to face interaction is not important but in some cases, these non face-to-face communication methods are just as good, if not better, than their face-to-face counterparts. Imagine stammering in front of that cute girl and ending up looking and acting like a total fool. You can say goodbye to a good first impression or even further contact with her. The poor shy boy may actually stand a better chance in getting to know her if he sat down, gathered his thoughts and presented his case in a clear and organised manner in a letter or email. Maybe a good way to calm that angry girlfriend of yours is to write her a nice romantic poem saying you're sorry.

The emotions and effort needed to string together a poem or a letter, using the appropriate words to convey intended messages, should not be discounted as "less personal" as compared to simply saying in person, "I like you" or "I'm sorry."

Writing personal letters, poems and songs may seem a tad "antique" to some but in my opinion can be just as charming a way to get to know someone. I'm sure there are some of you out there who agree with me.

As for this shy boy, when he wants to tell someone he likes her, he grabs his guitar and either start penning down his thoughts or recording that famous sappy song.. doing something like this,



and dropping it into her MSN shared folder...

That's my way of getting personal without really getting close. What's yours?